Update: Lindsay Lohan was denied

Lindsay Lohan is in LA now and last night she wanted to get into Trousdale club except security wouldn’t let her in. CDC’s orders ma’am. From Pacific Coast News:

Lindsay Lohan has a spot of bother persuading security to let her into Trousdale nightclub. LiLo spent 15 minutes persuading the doormen to allow her access to the brand new club. But strangely, after all that, Lindsay left the club having only spent 10 minutes inside as it was closing time!

As long as she got in I guess it was a moral victory. You showed them, Lindsay. they probably knew they were closing in 10 minutes so they let her in to mess with her. That’s what I would do. I would also whisper things into her ear when she wasn’t paying attention and replace her drink with a can of Red Bull and act like nothing happened.
Update: Lindsay was denied because there was a private party. In response, she tweeted her anger and frustration over not being treated like a spoiled princess.

“Last night was a private event with a guest list,” a club rep tells me. “The lounge is open for business on Tuesdays, Fridays and Saturdays, so any events on other nights are private.”
She eventually got in, but didn’t stay long. Of course, she took to Twitter to vent about the whole ordeal.
“I’ve never been treated so poorly in my life, this is why I never come to LA- isn’t security, after I respect them and their work and tip,” she first wrote.
“That was scary, mean, arrogant, and unnecessarily aggressive. I pick new york jus like Jay-Z…… Wouldn’t you?” she added.
According to her tweets, she was simply trying to visit a friend who was there from NYC.

This is pretty much how bouncers treat normal people. If you haven’t been in at least three movies, they just look at you and laugh.

Lindsay has been wronged

Not only is Lindsay delusional, but so are all the Lohans. Speaking to Page Six, Dina Lohan said that the E-Trade commercial featuring a boyfriend-stealing milkaholic baby named Lindsay gave the real Lindsay the sads. Hence, why they now want $100 million in pain and suffering.

“She said, ‘Mommy, help me. This is wrong. How can they do this?’ ” Dina Lohan said of a tearful phone call with her 23-year-old daughter after the big game.
“They’re little babies doing this, mocking another child who’s just trying to survive Hollywood, basically,” Dina Lohan said.
“I’m just basically glad I took a stand. I’m not going to let them do this to us anymore,” Dina Lohan said of the “horrible” and “mean” ad.
She said that the ad was clearly aimed at her daughter because unlike other stars, her daughter’s first name is synonymous with the “Herbie Fully Loaded” actress.
“Everyone knows Lindsay, like Cher or Madonna,” Dina Lohan said. But Grey Group, which produced the ad, insists that — unlike Oprah or Cher — Lindsay is a popular baby name. In fact, company spokesman Chris Brown said that someone working on the spot shared the name as well.

Whatever Lindsay and Dina are smoking, it must be fantastic. Let me guess, right after the commercial ended, Lindsay turned to her unicorn named Rainbow Brite and asked, “That commercial was about me, wasn’t it?”
The only difference between Lindsay and a crazy person is that instead of seeing secret messages from the CIA, Lindsay sees dollar signs.

Lindsay Lohan is a writer now

Lindsay Lohan tells OK! Magazine that her two court mandated trips to rehab were like a vacation for her. Lindsay loved meeting new people and seeing what they’re going through. There’s no mention of her getting any help for the addictions she had though. In fact, Lindsay thought some of her friends would benefit from rehab. So she was more like a scout than a patient there.
Asked whether she drinks responsibly, she responds, “Yeah. I mean, mind you, my drinking was never more than… I mean, here’s the thing, I have friends who would get so wasted at college. I have never been one to get drunk and act like that, that’s not who I am.” Right. Either Lindsay is naturally bat shit insane or she likes to drink excessively on occasion. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Just don’t lie to yourself.
Lindsay has also started writing a book. With words, I think.

“I write a lot and it’s very therapeutic for me because then I can see what’s happening on paper. I’ve started writing a book. It’s going to take a while, all my life experiences. I started writing it a year ago. There’s a lot to put down, you know?”

How much do you want to bet that, in between the pages of vomit and tears, this book is nothing but angry rantings about how “I hate my dad,” “The media is mean to me” and other excuses she makes for why she bangs on Samantha Ronson’s door like a maniac at 4 in the morning, why there was coke in her purse and why her life is a big mess.